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 Jay White2008-04-23T09:25:29.189-05:00Better Time Management Through Better Focus
In today’s hectic, multi-tasking society it can be difficult to maintain your focus on a project. We become easily distracted by many things – co-workers, the telephone, e-mail, or the television. We also lose our focus as we try to juggle several projects at once, finding ourselves pulled in many directions.
In order to accomplish more during your day, you must learn the technique of focusing your attention on one thing at a time. The more thought you can dedicate to one project, the quicker you will be able to complete it. Honing your ability to focus as a time management technique will translate directly into greater success completing your projects, and a greater amount of free time once you are finished.
- Keep a Calendar: Schedule time to work on projects, then make sure nothing interrupts you. This may mean turning off your email program, your instant messenger, etc. Every time you switch your thoughts away from your project to answer an e-mail, take a phone call, chat with a co-worker, or watch something on television, it takes your mind time to readjust to the project and regroup the necessary information. If you have 100 such distractions each day – which is entirely possible in a busy office – you could easily lose ½ to one hour of productive time. That adds up to between 10 and 20 hours a month – enough for an extra day or two off!
- One Thing at a Time: Do not switch back and forth between tasks or projects. Each time you move away from a project and then return to it later, it takes your brain a certain amount of time to dig around for all of the information it needs to focus on your goal. You will greatly increase your productivity if you can work one project through to completion before moving on to another project. This allows your brain to compile all of the necessary information, then hang onto it until you are through without losing time switching back and forth.
- Have a Plan: Some people work blindly, without any idea of where they are going with a project. Formulate a set of goals or a roadmap to a particular objective before you sit down to work on a project. Stabbing at it blindly will get you nowhere, and you may even find yourself making mistakes that need to be corrected later. Having an idea of where you want to take your project will help you work more efficiently.
- Control Your Thoughts: Intrusions from the telephone, from friends, and from co-workers are not the only distractions that can derail your efficiency. Your own mind can sabotage your efforts to work quickly, quietly, and concisely.
As you notice unrelated thoughts invading your head, acknowledge them and then consciously remove them from your mind. Put them to bed for the moment and return to the task at hand. Occupy your mind by musing about your project, keeping the thoughts related to it at the forefront of your mind. As you practice quieting your mind, you will notice it becomes easier and easier. Eventually you will be able to wipe your mind of all irrelevant thoughts and keep them at bay without ever making a conscious effort to do so.
When preparing to begin work on a project or task, prepare the area so it is free of distractions. Have your secretary answer the phone or allow the machine to pick up, close your e-mail accounts, and turn off the radio or television. Some people like the background noise from the television or radio, but the noise from it can be more distracting than helpful. The mind was not designed to think in parallel realms, and if it finds something on the radio more interesting than your project, your efficiency is going to suffer.
Try to employ these tips for successful time management. Once you have developed your concentration skills, you may feel like you suddenly have been given more hours in your workday. The truth is, you will have given yourself the gift of time. Who knows, maybe you can spend that well deserved hour at the local spa after work, letting a nimble fingered masseuse erase the stresses of the day from your memory.
-David
 Jay White2008-04-22T12:57:46.549-05:002 Simple Ingredients That Will Boost your Morning Energy
You have probably read that breakfast, as part of your morning routine, is extremely important to losing weight. I am not discrediting the preachers of this sentiment because not only am I one of them, but they are 100% correct. However, this is only a portion of the ritual you should begin. There should also be some form of exercise involved, albeit a jog, weight workout, or something simpler.
Realizing that money is tight and time is tighter, let's discuss a quick workout that doesn't cost a penny and can be knocked out in no time. Short and free, this routine will boost your morning energy level exponentially, especially if your current workout only consists of a shower.
Sound good?
Great. Let's agree that if you are not working out already, you will try this tomorrow morning. Any takers? Is anyone willing to make a small change to their morning in the interest of increased energy, a better mood, and oh, less fat?
Good. Let's go.
When you get up, right after you eat your breakfast, do this push up routine:
- Muster up some will, get down and pump out as many push ups as you can do.
- Wait 30 seconds
- Pump out more push ups (again as many as you can do)
- Wait 30 seconds
- Pump out more pushups (again as many as you can do and don't hold back… really push it!)
When you are done and you stand up, whatever the tired, sluggish, or "get out of my face" morning feeling you might have felt will have been replaced with an "I am the shiznit!!!" feeling.
Don't be surprised if you feel like pumping out a fast core routine. In fact go for it!
Here is a quick Core Routine that you can do: - Lie down on the floor
- Lift your feet off the floor to about 6 inches while keeping your lower back on the floor
- Scissor kick for 1 minute
- Rest 30 seconds
- Scissor kick for another minute
Good for you. You have done more than 99% of people typically do in the morning. It will also follow you into your day and make you be a lot more productive.
Not only have you eaten a great tasty breakfast that has revved up your metabolism, but you have shocked your muscles and woken them up to further boost your metabolism. Hey you are feeling pretty darn great… get off to work and kick some butt; life is good.
You just went through the ultimate morning… if you are one of the few that workout in the morning, don't worry I have something of for you too.
-Dan
 Jay White2008-04-22T08:39:21.140-05:002 Ways To Fish For Friends By Using The Right Bait
For many years during my childhood, friends would come in and out of my life. I recall this being a hit to my self-esteem at times, while I was perfectly able to assign this blame to others as well. I mean it's perfectly feasible that my ex-friends and my ex-girlfriends were just sucky people, so why would I want to be friends with them anyway?
After years of people coming in and out of my life I made an important realization. The friends that I would have, and the people that would want to stay in my life, were directly correlated to how I would treat them.
About a year ago I was sitting at Dmitry's apartment. One of my best friends, that I often work out the details of this world with. I said to him "I want to possess the power to make deep personal connections with people within 15 seconds of meeting them." Fifteen seconds seemed like it was enough time, and a deep personal connection presented itself as a very admirable goal.
On many levels I have been able to accomplish this goal with people in my life. The results were astounding but they didn't come with me gaming the system or manipulating people. They came with two important distinctions.
The last point in my personal mission statement now reads, "The possibility that I have created for myself and my life is the possibility of being someone who operates with the greatest good of all in mind, and the possibility of living in the present."
- Have Their Greatest Good In Mind. This one distinction allowed me to come up to any person without fear. Whether it's a high powered CEO that I want to talk success with or a very pretty girl that I want to introduce myself to. When what you come with is the intention to bring value to a person you develop a very strong rapport that can be sensed as soon as people look at you.
You've heard people say "that guy looks slimy (car salesmen!) but I can't put my finger on it". Having people's good in mind gives people the exact opposite reaction to you. It's pleasant, comforting, and makes people want to develop a deeper connection with you, even after 15 seconds.
- Remarkable Presence equals Oozing Charisma. The reason that being really present with someone gives off such a high level of charisma and makes them want to be around you is that it makes them feel important.
Think about it. You create a moment where that person is the only thing that matters. You're listening to every word that comes out of their mouth as you watch their eyes with patience and understanding. The friends I have now are what I consider high quality people. Ambitious, high moral value, easy going, and relentlessly trustworthy. It's important that I have a high opinion of my friends. After all, we are all the average of the 5 people with whom we spend the most time. We owe it to ourselves to position ourselves within a high quality group.
-Alex
 Alex Shalman2008-04-21T12:18:21.308-05:00The Moment of Truth The following is an extract from one of my fave movies - A Few Good Men (or as it's known here in Australia - Three Grouse Blokes):
Jessep (Jack): "You want answers?"
Kaffee (Tom): "I think I'm entitled to them."
Jessep: "You want answers?"
Kaffee: "I want the truth!"
Jessep: "You can't handle the truth! Son, we live in a world that has walls. And those walls have to be guarded by men with guns. Who's gonna do it? You? You, Lt. Weinberg? I have a greater responsibility than you can possibly fathom. You weep for Santiago and you curse the Marines. You have that luxury. You have the luxury of not knowing what I know: that Santiago's death, while tragic, probably saved lives. And my existence, while grotesque and incomprehensible to you, saves lives. You don't want the truth. Because deep down, in places you don't talk about at parties, you want me on that wall. You need me on that wall."
Maybe Jessep wasn't completely wrong... Sorry for boring you with half of the script but I love that part of the film (must be a boy thing). Even though Jack (sorry, Jessep) was kind of out of his tree when he spoke those words in the court room, he was, on a level, providing his audience with a certain degree of insight, honesty and truth. He spoke some truth about the truth. So to speak. And the truth is that many people don't want to hear the truth - they want to hear what they're comfortable to hear. So often we don't want to be confronted, challenged or questioned and we definitely don't want to have to change our beliefs, behaviours or habits. Too uncomfortable and too inconvenient. And too much work. We're fine with the truth so long as it doesn't mean that we have to modify or interrupt our lives in any significant way.
So instead of being open to learning some valuable truth, truth that could change our reality for the better, we often become defensive, critical and/or angry. Acknowledging certain things would mean that we'd have to do and be different... and that's the last thing we want to do, so we don't. "Let them do the changing."
Sorry for being honest... Over the years I have been abused by many people for being honest about certain important issues. I call it honest, they call it offensive. Funny that. Perspective can be the difference between being empowered and educated, and being a victim. People ask for me advice and then when I tell them what they don't want to hear, they criticize me. Apparently it makes them feel better about themselves. I never (ever) tell people the truth to hurt, discourage or criticize - only to help them create positive change in their life. And yes of course, there is a time, a place and a way to deliver certain messages with sensitivity and compassion, but there's also a time when we need to stop skirting the issues and actually deal with things head on - as unpopular and as uncomfortable as that may be. I wish I had ten bucks for every obese person I've spoken to over the years who 'hardly eats a thing'.
Amazing phenomenon that; self-generating fat. "So where did all this fat come from then Kelvin? I know a little about the physiology of the human body and I'm pretty sure that fat can't be spontaneously produced from thin air."
Harsh? Nope; honest. The truth. Sometimes, things are as offensive as we make them. We can get offended or we can get enlightened. Smart. Proactive. Different. We can make a positive from something we once would have made a negative. The important thing about truth is how we deal with it and what we do with it. And many of us deal with it badly. Or don't deal with at all.
Darn those big bones "Sure Kelvin, you can keep lying to about your big bones, your slow metabolism, your crappy genetics and your very healthy diet for the next five years, but the only person you're fooling is you. Everyone in the world except you (apparently) knows that you tell lies and eat too much food. Get your head around that truth and you might actually change your body.
My experience is that the majority of people lie when questioned in any depth about their lifestyle, exercise and nutritional habits. That is, they don't tell me the whole truth. They selectively leave things out. They are more concerned with 'looking and sounding good' than they are with telling me the absolute truth and genuinely addressing their problems in a real and practical way. Waddabout my hormones? Now, before you write in and tell me about hormonal issues and obesity... don't bother. Yes, I acknowledge that some people have significant problems with their endocrine system (it's actually a very small percentage of the overall population) but for this post and this lesson, these are not the people we're talking about. And by the way, if you think that our current global obesity epidemic is even vaguely because of 'hormonal issues' then you're extremely misinformed. Overall, we're fatter than ever because we eat too much and move to little... end of story.
Sure we can try and make it more complex and write another fifteen million books on the subject (and continue to go around in circles) or we can simply acknowledge the truth and do something about it.
There's a wacky thought.
A common Harperism that you'll often hear in my presentations is this:
"I can tell you what you want to hear, or I can tell you the truth... which would you prefer?" Some people respond positively to this statement, others cross their legs and arms (and brains) and assume the defensive position - clearly, I've come to destroy their lives. I can usually identify the non-learners and the brick walls even before I open my mouth. Their body language is screaming:
- I don't want to be here - but my boss is making me.
- Please don't refer to me, look at me, ask me a question or involve me in any way.
- I am absolutely not ready to change, so don't you dare try and make me!
- Anyway, who are you to tell me anything, you big tool?
The years have taught me to be selective and discerning about what truth I share, when and where I share it, and with whom. When I'm coaching people these days, the first thing I do is find out whether or not they're genuinely ready to step into reality and talk about the core issues (about their situation and problems) in a real, honest and truthful manner. If all they want is for me to hold their hand and tell them that their destructive behaviours are understandable and okay, then I tell them to come back when they're genuinely ready to change and to be honest and accountable.
I do not try to teach people who do not want to learn. And neither should you. It's an exercise in frustration and futility. And sometimes, hostility!
We all do it.
We all avoid the truth from time to time. I've done it, you've done it. It's easier. For a while. Then it's much harder. Much. We do it with our health, our relationships, our career, our finances, our destructive habits... our life. I've spoken about this phenomenon before, it's called head-in-the-sand-itis. Most times, dealing with and acknowledging the truth in a honest, logical and practical manner (especially when it comes to our own behaviours and habits) will save us plenty of time, heart-ache and frustration over the long term.
Ignoring the fact doesn't change the fact. It is what it is.
Sometimes we just need to open our eyes.
-Craig
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