The Week's Top Beautiful Videos From Vimeo [Wednesday Morning Film Fest]

There's a baby doing Abbott and Costello this week on Vimeo, the underrated video site for the artsy crowd. Top videos also include the usual stop-motion, timelapse, and such, which let's be honest is always fun the way Twinkies are always tasty. (As usual, this week YouTube's top videos sucked.) Here are the best six videos.

The Two-Act (Merlin Mann and a baby):

One Day at Fenway (Baseball stadium timelapse):

Topography (notebook stop-motion):

One Day (like that sequence in Snatch but spread out):

Nerd (a Jake and Amir sketch):

On This Day, Years Ago, You Emerged From Your Mother's Va-jay (surprisingly adorable):

Twitter Saves American Arrested In Egypt [Twitter]

When a Berkeley grad student was jailed in Egypt for taking photos of a demonstration, he Twittered the word "ARRESTED." His Twitter followers (Egyptian bloggers and American friends) called the college, the US Embassy, and the international press, and the police soon released him. Of course theoretically he could have just called someone, but that wouldn't be much of a story. [Mercury News]

Brigitte Bardot Tired Of Muslims [Race-baiting]

Brigitte Bardot is not only still alive, she's apparently racist! Repeatedly and aggressively racist, actually. "I am a little tired of prosecuting Mrs Bardot," said a French prosecutor upon commencing the fifth case against the former film star for "inciting racial hatred." Here is what the 73-year-old animal rights activist said this time around:

"I am fed up with being under the thumb of this population which is destroying us, destroying our country and imposing its acts," the star of 'And God created woman' and 'Contempt' said.

Bardot has previously said France is being invaded by sheep-slaughtering Muslims and published a book attacking gays, immigrants and the unemployed, in which she also lamented the "Islamisation of France".

Thank God she demanded her singing not be used in my favorite Serge Gainsbourg song back in the 60s, because otherwise I'd have to now burn my iPod or something.

[Reuters]

The Silent Staring Japanese Girl Is Ugly, Not Japanese [Camgirls]

Well ugly is such a harsh word, so judge for yourself in the videos below: first, one of the videos I talked about from the silent (but occasionally Japanese-speaking) cute camgirl known as Magibon. Then a clip of her on a Japanese talk show, where she needed an English translator. Without the flattering bird's eye angle of her webcam, her face is long and plain; her teeth are terribly crooked. There's more information in this juvenile wiki article.

Cute Magibon:

Not as cute Magibon:

She's reportedly 21 and from Florida; anyone who can translate, please do in the comments.

T Wouldn't Miss Standards Editor [Feuds]

Among the names floated by Radar yesterday as possibly taking a Times buyout was Craig Whitney, the assistant managing editor overseeing journalistic standards. Whitney sided with public editor Clark Hoyt in a recent internal Times feud over semi-nude photos in T Magazine of a 17-year-old girl (pictured) whose blurred breast was exposed. Hoyt and Whitney argued the photo did not belong in the paper, T and the main Times Magazine basically called Hoyt and Whitney Philistines. The folks at T would be happy to see "prudish" Whitney go, claims one observer, if only because they see his very job as unnecessary. Of course, it was barely a month ago that Whitney was reminding everyone to attempt to interview multiple people when writing profiles. Sometimes a prude is just what you need.

Harry Potter Lexicographer Sobs, Times Pokes Fun [Steven Jan Vander Ark]

"The librarian, Steven Jan Vander Ark, had the mild-mannered demeanor of Ron Weasley, and the intelligence, charm — and haircut — of Harry Potter. Even his name sounds like that of a character in one of the books, if preceded by 'Lord' or 'Master.'" You should talk, Anemona Hartocollis! [Times]

Terrible Drawings Based On CNN's Terrible Headlines [Cnn]

For years, like half of Gawker's posts were just screencaps of CNN headlines. They don't even need jokes, they're so terrible. But what they do need, even if we didn't know it, are ugly hand-drawn illustrations.

When Men Were Men And Women Made Their Coffee Right Or Got Cheated On [Things We Actually Like]

It's 1963 and this housewife had better find a better brand of coffee or her husband will taste a little of the secretary's, if you know what I mean (I mean he will sex them). As a reader said at Boing Boing, "It's like a teaser for season 2 of Mad Men!"

Celebrity Ex-Scientologist: "Let Will Smith Know That His Shit Was Fucking Recorded" [Jason Beghe]

Jason Beghe, the television and film actor starring in a blunt video about his Scientology days, has begun a media campaign to spread what he knows about the cult, and his latest salvo is a Village Voice interview in which he calls the Church of Scientology a "gossip factory" and says that it tapes all of its auditing sessions using secret cameras. "He's been cheating on his wife," he was told of one actor he wanted to cast in a recruiting video. He also has some dirt on Tom Cruise:

Beghe claimst that the religion’s top star, Tom Cruise, was actually mostly separated from the church for several years. Other celebrities, he points out, go through similar periods of no longer auditing or moving up the Bridge, but are still considered members. Bringing Cruise back into a more active role, Beghe says, was a major Miscavige project.

“He was out for like ten years. There are people who just aren’t doing anything Some are out but don’t talk about it. Why? The church is scary. These are bad motherfuckers.”

Once his disappointment was so great he began talking about leaving altogether, Beghe says the church sent people to talk him out of it.

Beghe said he worked constantly to ascend the Scientology hierarchy over the course of his first year, bypassing longtime member and fellow actor John Travolta. Celebrities were coveted — Scientologists can clear their record of misdeeds by recruiting one — and Beghe came to regard many as "dilettantes" who enjoyed special privileges but did not work hard.

But all were subject to vicious internal gossip.

“Not one auditing session—which are supposed to be private—is not recorded on film,” he says, and claims that secret cameras are used at every session at the Celebrity Centre in Los Angeles, recording sessions that for Scientologists are supposed to be something like confessionals in the Catholic church.

“Will Smith is supposedly dabbling in Scientology. Let Will Smith know that his shit was fucking recorded. And tell him to look them in the eye and see if he believes it when they deny it.”

Even worse, he says, is that behind the backs of celebrities, Scientology officials gossip about what transpires in those supposedly private sessions. “Everything’s supposed to be confidential. But all they do is chat about it,” he says.

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